When we experience pain during love, we tend not to talk about it: we think we are abnormal, we are a little ashamed, we are embarrassed to explain to our partner why we no longer feel desire at all. ..

Stop! When there is a problem, especially a sexual one, talk about it! The  Dr Sylvain Mimoun, gynaecologist psychosomatician, gives us advice. 


Where does the pain come from during sex?

It can have a physical or psychological origin. But often the two overlap: pain causes anguish … and anguish causes tension … which can cause pain.

Either way, the best solution is to consult a gynaecologist. If he or she does not identify anything, take a second opinion: if the pain is in the back of the stomach, it may very well be digestive, and in this case, a general practitioner can help you.

If the pain is at the entrance to the vagina, you should put a lot of lubricants, even to the partner. And especially not to force yourself.

If it’s a real phobia, consider sex therapy. And above all, to say that things can be unlocked without us understanding why. With patience, we get by.


Burns during intercourse

Burning sensations occur as soon as you touch an external part of the vagina ( vulva, clitoris, lips).

  • What’s this?

Certainly a genital infection: either a mycosis or a sexually transmitted infection (herpes, gonorrhoea).

To make his diagnosis, the gynaecologist must, in addition to the clinical examination (irritation, redness), take vaginal samples.

  • Treatment

To treat a mycosis, it is generally sufficient to have a local treatment (ovum and cream), even antifungal tablets.

If an STI is detected, consideration may be given to taking antibiotics or antiviral treatment, as appropriate.


Pain while making love: what to do if it gets hot?

Often this feeling is due to a lack of lubrication.

  • What’s this?

Most of the time, vaginal dryness is caused by a lack of estrogen. It sometimes happens in case of early menopause (rare, at age 30).

But psychological factors (stress, negative self-image, lack of desire) or certain drug treatments (diuretics, antihistamines) can be the cause of temporary dryness.

  • Treatment

The best natural treatment: prolong foreplay! And think about using a lubricant to alleviate the feeling of discomfort.

If the drought is of hormonal origin, local estrogen (egg or cream) will be offered.

Pain during penetration

It is pain at the very beginning of penetration at the entrance to the vagina and felt chronically since the first sexual intercourse.

  • What’s this?

It may be a small vaginal malformation or a hymen that is too tight for lack of sexual practice.

  • Treatment

In the first case, a slight surgical gesture is sufficient. In the other, the solution is rather psychological and emotional: the doctor helps to manage this pain so that it decreases, and provides the means to discover pleasure.

Deep pain while making love

In the uterus, with a feeling of heaviness in the lower abdomen.

  • What’s this?

gynaecological disease is certainly involved:  ovarian cyst, inflamed fibroma, proboscis, endometriosis

To find out, the gynaecologist will prescribe certain examinations (X-ray, hysterography, vaginal ultrasound).

  • Treatment

A small adjustment of hormones, sometimes a surgical intervention (banal and frequent)

Sharp pain while making love

And penetration almost impossible.

  • What’s this?

It’s called vaginismus, and it’s a reflex contraction of the muscles around the vagina.

No organic reason: it is an automatic defence, due to an ignorance of one’s body, a phobia of penetration, sometimes a trauma.

  • Treatment

Get to know your own sex better,  regain self-confidence, relax, and consider sex therapy or psychotherapy depending on the importance of the disorders.